I was walking through the park the other day when it happened. I was just minding my own business walking by this father and son. I wasn’t really paying much attention to what the son said to the father and then BAM it happened. The father hit the child out of no where.
He didn’t actually physically hit him. He did something that I find just as bad. He said something to the boy that could change his life for the worse:
He said, “If you have to keep asking questions, it means you’re not smart enough”. I wanted to smack the father as I walked by.
Not only is the statement patently false, it limits the child’s learning abilities as he grows older. Imagine the young boy sitting in school and he doesn’t understand something. He desperately wants to ask a question. But asking a question means that he isn’t smart. What the boy doesn’t understand is that if he doesn’t ask the question, he is won’t understand. It is a catch 22. He’s dumb if he asks (according to his father) and he becomes dumb if he doesn’t.
Now imagine that you work for this guy, the father. Imagine you go into his office and ask a few questions. Guess what he thinks of you? He thinks you’re an idiot. Why on earth would you have to ask so many questions? You must not be smart. Hands up if you would like to work for this guy? I know I wouldn’t.
This father’s belief – just one single belief – can be destroying lives all around him and he probably doesn’t even know it. He probably doesn’t even know that the reason his staff doesn’t do their job well is because of he belief that they can’t not the actual capabilities of his staff. He creates a state of helplessness. If a person is confused as to what to do, they are dumb if they ask a question and lost if they don’t. What occurs? Inaction. Loss of productivity.
All of this over one silly belief.
Remember, your beliefs need to open you up to possibility not restrict you. The need to provide you choices and options rather than rules and punishment. Do your beliefs empower or inhibit?
And if you want to help me, please share this post on social media because I would really love for this father to see it.