Most people who suffer from anxiety or worry a lot have a little bit of a problem making decisions. Here’s what happens:
- Something comes up and you need to decide and instead you agonize over it
- You put off the decision while you gather information about whatever it is
- You second guess whether you’ve gathered all of the information or have considered all of the options
- You may actually make a decision – or think you have
- Once you do, you will second guess any decision you’ve made and seek reassurance that you’ve made the right decision
There’s two problems with this. The first problem is that the decision isn’t actually made. It’s still in your brain. It’s still being processed and worried over. The other problem is that you don’t have ONE decision to make every day. You have lots of them. Multiply this process for each decision waiting to be made and you’ll understand why you have anxiety.
So how do you stop this endless suffering? You practice making small decisions every day.
When someone asks you, “Where do you want to go for lunch?” Don’t say, “I don’t care.” Make a decision about where you want to go for lunch and say it.
When someone asks you, “What movie do you want to watch?” Don’t say, “I doesn’t matter.” Make a decision and choose which one you want to see.
When someone asks you, “Where should I sit?” Don’t say, “Oh, you can sit anywhere.” Tell them where to sit and pull out their chair.
When someone asks, “Do you want fries with that?” Say no because fries aren’t really good for you. 😉
The point is, make lots of insignificant choices each day. No one will die if you speak your mind and make a choice. No one will think you’re pushy or self-centered. No one will stop liking you because you say what you want.
Get in the habit of making small choices every day and you’ll train your brain to make bigger decisions when the time comes.